CURMUDGEON REPORT #9

by Rubenchito

Headline of a local newspaper article:

“Got chocolate milk? No longer”

 

Socrates got hisself in uh real stew when I read ’im the article entitled Got chocolate milk? No longer. He simmered down when I explained he could still have chocolate milk with his crackers, it was just the Minneapolis schools what put the kibosh on the blend of moo and cacao as a student beverage.

The school district’s director of nutrition services quote was offered as justification: “Consuming chocolate milk every day can train a child’s palate toward sweetened foods.” Criminy! Let’s feed infants switch grass or alfalfa. Train them ignorant palates t’ like somethin’ friendly t’ the environment – and cheap. Sugar plantations could be burned over, the owners imprisoned an’ the space used to set up schools for food commissars or farms for switch grass and alfalfa. Any students askin’ for something sweet would have t’ spend their summer vacations workin’ the farms. Boy! That ud train them little palates.

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